Approximate reading time: 4 min
Written 16th November 2021
Today was just one of those
Truly beautiful days
Where everything flows
The world feels calm and OK
Although I woke up this morning
Contemplating a sickie
Bloody period pain
Feeling blue and ickie…
But then I did my meditation
(I didn’t want to stop)
It’s amazing how lately
It seems less like a job
Rather than something
That I just need to get through
Meditation has become something
I actually look forward to
Personally, I can’t believe it
How many years?
I’m so grateful I stuck with it
I’m grateful I persevered
But work came in
In a reception class
In one of my favourite schools
I decided not to pass
And as I’m dressing I notice
The thoughts swimming around my head
The usual neurotic thoughts
That always fill me with dread
They pretty much reoccur
(Religiously every month)
When the painters are in
They are hard to expunge
“You are pretty much a hermit
You never go out
All you do day and night
Is paint and write….
So realistically the odds
Of you EVER meeting someone
Are probably about
Mmmmmm….
1 million to one
And more than that
You want an amazing, human being
Who has similar passions, goals
A deep desire for meaning
Someone who knows who they are
Who can speak up and be true
Someone who’s courageous and honest
In all that they do“
Flushed with sudden grief
As the bitter voice hissed
“A man like that clearly
Doesn’t exist!”
In an instant another voice
Bullhorned its way through
“Oh my God listen to yourself
How arrogant are you?
There’s a world full of incredible
Human beings out there
With patchwork lives
That they too long to share
So many people creating
Wonderful things
Standing in their truth
Finding their own meaning!”
But this voice wasn’t critical
It wasn’t unkind
It gently stepped in to help
My heart and ego realign
To remind me, that there are
Infinite possibilities
Of men in this world
Wonderful for me
It snapped me magically
Out of my funk
I set my intention:
Today’d be peaceful and fun!
Subsequently, I spent the day
In a truly beautiful class
With such friendly and kind
Teacher Assisting staff
When I walked in the door
One strode up confidently
And actually, shook my hand
To say hello and greet me.
“Oh my God” I said
No one has done that for years!
Since covid has started
The world has been drowning in fear.”
We both started laughing
It honestly felt so good
To connect to another human
Like we used to do
And then the tiniest
Cutest
Most adorable little boy
Just filled my day today
With absolute joy
When it came to cuteness
He’d win the crown
(He’d beat the Gerry Mcquire kid
Honestly hands down)
He had a disability
It’s not clear what
It had something to do
With his tiny little heart
So hence the reason
He was so incredibly small
And all he wanted to do
Was play on a wall
He’d climb up and shout:
“Look, look at me!”
Then he’d make this huge
Brave, daring leap
Right from the very top
Of that high wall
(Which was ummm 30cm perhaps?
If that at all)
I’d clap and I’d whoop
As he beamed with pride
He had more fun on that wall
Than any playground ride
So that was my day
Simply happy and joyful
One of those days
When I feel calm and fulfilled
I wanted to record it
So it never goes away
And invite the universe to send
More of them my way