Approximate reading time: 3min
Written 18th of July 2021
A weight has been lifted
It feels like I can breathe
Not gripped in my gut
strangled by anxiety
I can fuck up
I can fail
I can get it all wrong
That doesn’t mean I should never
Ever belong
The beauty of what I’m feeling
At this moment right now
is a feeling no school
can ever disembowel
It’s absolute gratitude
for all of who I am
my path my lessons
everything unplanned
Enveloped in love
and absolute joy
So grateful I didn’t give this
the power to destroy
My faith
My hope
In all that is good
A strong belief that I did
the absolute best that I could
Because in the big scheme of things
Life is a chaotic mess
Every single day
New difficulties to address
I’m in awe of this feeling
so calm and serene
That I am capable of handling
what life throws at me
It’s a beautiful place
to sit and just be
It’s amazing to know
This is also a part of me
Along with my rage
and my morbid bits
There’s this part of me
that so delightfully fits
A song came on the radio
that I absolutely adore
A song by Avicii
(That I’ve never heard before)
Broken Arrow speaks of ‘hope’
(despite all you go through)
finding the people who love
and genuinely care for you
I’m reminded so clearly
Whenever I think of this man
the importance of acknowledging
simply what you can…
It’s about using your gifts
in ways that work for you
not doing what you think
others expect you to do
Knowing your values
and the strengths you’ve got
throwing them together
in your vocation pot
I adore kids
I absolutely do
But working permanently in a school
Doesn’t need to be my truth
Because I also love change
I love mixing things up
The excitement of not knowing
What’s next in the line-up
I love meeting new people
every single day
So many wonderful souls
walking this plain
I love having time for myself
to paint and to write
Being creative brings me
so much joy and delight
It feels pretty amazing
(At this moment)
to be free
From this feeling that the world
Owes something to me
