Approximate reading time: 10min Written the 25th June 2021 I was offered this reception job On a full-time contract Finally paid for the summer holidays (Fantastic! Imagine that!) After ten long years of being self-employed A regular pay check I was overjoyed Absolutely elated things were finally on track Except for one tiny minuscule, little fact …
Category: Anxiety/Depression
Holiday Blues
Approximate reading time: 2 minutes Written 5th of June 2021 My birthday celebration a weekend away A riverside cabin and all I feel is grey . Enveloped in sadness all I want to do is cry I am sitting here wondering Why, fucking why? Why do holidays always trigger so much grief What is the …
Weekend Away
Approximate reading time: 4min Written the 4th June 2021 A gorgeous cabin in New Forest for the weekend my first holiday EVER away with my best friend I should feel happy, excited to finally be getting away by the time I boarded the train I felt nothing but dismay Completely overwhelmed drowned by anxiety OMG …
The ‘Fakeness’ Queen
Approximate reading time: 10min I hope you are all well:-) I am happy to report it has been a relatively drama-free week!! (Yayeeeee me!) Of course, it has helped that I have been on holiday for a week and have not had to engage much with the general public. Random VERY IMPORTANT Information: I have …
Hold the line
Approximate reading time: 6 min Written the 23rd May 2021 Avicii is dead!? Three years ago! How can this be? How did I NOT know? Well in fairness I know the answer to that Ten years ago I made myself a pact to stop watching the news reading newspapers and magazines which only fuelled my …
Dysregulation
Approximate reading time: 6 minutes I find it very interesting how so much of my life at the moment, somehow seems to link in with each new poem at hand. Same life lessons, different contexts. ****** So, last week was pretty great. I was a happy mummy to one doggy child. While walking Bailey …
Time for Everything
Approximate reading time: 4 minutes Last week was a super chilled week. I had two days of lectures and two days with lovely Bailey. Dolly’s mum has decided to send Dolly to doggy daycare during the week so now I only have Bailey to contend with. I have to admit it’s much easier having one …
Thank you
Written 2 April 2021 I’m still trying to finish “Finding my words” A month and a half later isn’t that absurd I’m suddenly very mindful that I need to take a break I’m emotional, teary my chest physically aches So I quietly sit down take some time to meditate A hopeful attempt, perhaps some calmness …
I H.A.T.E Yoga!
Approximate reading time: 4 min Written 28th April 2021 Bessel Van de Kolk Author of the ‘The body keeps score’ Quotes nothing heals trauma Significantly more Than doing dreaded yoga Connecting to your breath…. (Honestly, I’d rather Pull all my teeth instead) I’ve tried stupid yoga Many times before Every single time I want to …
The final decision
Approximate Reading time: 10 min Written 22nd of April 2021 My first EMDR session was scheduled for today I woke up more anxious than I care to say I’m not a morning person (Understatement of the year) Sometimes it’s 2pm before my anxiety disappears When I’m feeling like this the walk to school is never …