Approximate Reading time:5 min

Written 3rd April 2021

Sometimes I wish

 I could live in a cocoon

Hide away from people

where I feel safe and immune

People often trigger me

so immensely

(Especially those

who are mean and unfriendly)

My school is so lovely

 the staff are amicable and nice…

But as always one or two,

trigger my hearts vice

Yesterday, someone

 (let’s call her ‘Jude’)

 was dismissive to a child

 (she was frankly plain rude)

I was appalled

I honestly couldn’t believe my eyes

this little girl is four

and I can only surmise…

…she didn’t answer quick enough

 dismissed with the flick of a hand

Jude served the other children

Left this poor child to stand

Frozen on the spot

Looking terrified

Staring up at me – confusion in her eyes

I SPOKE UP!!!

I was so angry

I honestly saw red…

it’s Jude’s job to ensure

that EVERY child is fed!

“Could you please have a little patience,

this child’s on the spectrum”

Clearly, she hadn’t been fast enough

 to keep up with Jude’s momentum

I was met with a vicious look

filled with absolute rage

How dare I call Jude out

and challenge her on ‘her stage’

“I was!”

she hissed

 as she motioned to the line

“I have all these kids

to feed in a certain time”

That doesn’t mean you can be so

abrasive and outright rude

when you have 4-year-old kids

 all needing to get food

Now I’m going to be honest

Jude and I might never be friends

If I was more like Mother Teresa

I would all irritation ascend

But I’m not

 I’m me!

And this triggers me so

Grown-up bullies who’re mean to kids

 I’d love to tell them where to go!

I’ve watched in silence

as Jude adores certain kids

while others get ignored

like they barely exist

Honestly, it enrages

me to the absolute core

how people like this

are employed in schools galore!

Surely actually liking kids

should be the basic necessity….

That gets you through that front door

in all sincerity

******

So today at lunch

I got given the filthiest ever look

from this nasty, mean

 and disingenuous cook

I actually laughed

I laughed out loud

I honestly don’t care

 if she chooses me to disavow…

I am so done being intimidated

by bullies who are rude

Glare as much as you like

 Oh dearest Jude

The upside of that?

Was a complaint made to the Head

“I was impolite

and I had embarrassed her”

she said

Dearest Jude

Please note I wasn’t rude

I simply asked that you give

my autistic child some food

I’ll challenge you again

and again if you are mean

if you are abrupt with my kids

I’ll always intervene!

As for your filthy looks

I will continue to laugh…

you are a bully who intimidates

 and often mean to staff

If you don’t want me to laugh

it’s QUITE simple: Don’t glare

I will not be intimidated

by your bullish, aggressive stare

So, I am proud of how I handled it

I am grateful I was strong…

But it still fills me with sadness

that something is so wrong

Schools should be that absolute

‘safest’ of space

where children are modelled love

 patience and grace

But I know

I absolutely know in my heart

that the chances of that happening

 are limited from the start

I used to wonder if I’d choose

to keep my kids in home-school

To protect my children

from all that is cruel

But as I have got older

I have learnt to understand

I’ve internalized this lesson

completely first-hand

No matter where you are

no matter where you go….

Trying to avoid these people

is like winning the lotto

My job will not be

to wrap my kids in cotton wool

to shield them from those

who’re hurtful and cruel

My job is to love them

help them to know

that their worth is not depicted

 on the behaviour others show

My job will be to comfort

 remind them they are strong

To find the words to use

when they feel things are wrong.

My job is to help them

build a thicker skin than me

so that they can go out into the world

way more confidently