Poetry, Self-love

The big Heave Ho

Approximate reading time: 11 minutes

Written the 14th July 2021

I’m staring at my delivery’s

(£250 worth!)

In hindsight I wish

I’d given shopping a wide berth

I treated myself

to orthopaedic shoes

I’ve needed them for ages

 They’ve been long overdue

I finally had

a bonified full-time job

And I think I am worth it…

(am I not?)

I honestly was so excited

I could barely wait

The end of self-employment

I needed to celebrate

Well, I just got fired

I got given the sack

It was politely said

They don’t want me back

I have honestly never

been so shocked in my life

As I sat and listened

to the explanation why

“It’s not personal”

I was told

(Um no, of course not)

But I’m so confused

How did I lose this plot?

“You are great with the kids

It’s really not that

But we have other concerns

We need to look at

We are not really sure

 that you fit in”

(I sat there quietly

soaking it all in)

“You don’t bond with parents

or get along with staff”

I almost looked behind me

are you having a fucking laugh?

Mention was made

 of what happened yesterday

When I came in at lunchtime

disgruntled to complain

I wholeheartedly agreed

I didn’t protest

(Yesterday I certainly

 wasn’t at my best)

But internal thoughts

swimming through my head

Backtracking over what actually

It was that I said

I wasn’t screaming

I certainly didn’t shout

I was frustrated that we

were expected to go without …

a lunch break while working

the entire morning flat

(Frankly, I think I had the right

to be a little annoyed at that!)

But I simply stated

 “You are correct

 I could have handled that

 with a little more respect

Which was why I sent

The message to apologise

 I dropped the ball

That’s not a lie.”

Internal thoughts:

Surely

 I’m not the ONLY person in school

who has got a little dysregulated

or has perhaps lost their cool?

I, myself, have witnessed

the delightful cook “Jude”

Ranting and raving

in the office at you

Moving on you then shifted to

 “It’s bigger than that!”

(I wait, as you take out

your baseball bat)

“Staff members have complained

Unfortunately, about you…”

“Really, please tell me

 I’d love to know who?”

Well first mention was made of

Lovely Mrs Leigh

(Someone who brings me

 regular cups of tea)

She comes in every morning

to give me a hug

We laugh and have fun

All I ever feel is loved

We had a disagreement

(a couple of months back)

But we spoke about it afterwards

Everything was on track

We hugged

We laughed

and we both agreed

 it was so lovely to solve disagreements

so civilly

We’ve both been so excited

 talking about plans for next year

So, if she has a problem with me

Why am I the last to hear?

The second person

Lined up in my firing squad

My teaching assistant John

(Oh No Good God!)

That would be the same person

that the school let go?

Due to concerns of how

he couldn’t cope?

The same person that would

  yell and scream at kids

Is now your key witness?

(Heaven forbid!)

I say nothing I keep quiet

 I’m just listening to you talk

My heart is being stabbed

 by a million pitchforks

Apparently, you say

John’s been complaining regularly

about how terrible it is

having to work with me

(Mmm, interesting and yet

At no single point

 Did you come speak to me

find out my viewpoint?

If I’m so ‘awful’ to work with

If I cause so much stress

Should I not have been given a warning

 and firmly addressed?)

I ask:

“I wonder did you perhaps speak

To anybody in the school

 That actually likes me?

 How about Usma

Who’s in my class every day

Did you perhaps enquire

 what she might have to say?”

No answer

Silence

WAIT….

We are moving on …

(I had

No idea

The list would be so long)

Yes, apparently dearest

There is indeed MORE?

Evidence of how I don’t gel

with parents

AT ALL

I sent an email

to Toxic Mum yesterday

who completely ignores me

and has nothing to say

I have noticed a shift

in her child’s behaviour around me

No doubt she’s picking up on

Her mum’s animosity

The happy child is gone

She’s more anxious and stressed

It breaks my heart

 I have to confess

So, I wanted to reach out

Send an olive branch of sort

I wanted her to know

 that her child is in my thoughts

I validated I knew how hard

 It must be at home

I wanted her to know

that she is not alone

That I do regular check-ins

to make sure her child is ok

Her child’s happiness is my goal

At the end of the day

 I attached an article about

After-school collapse restraint

(One I’ve shared with numerous parents

without any complaint)  

I hoped it would somehow…

Let her know that I understand

Absolutely nothing

in that email was meant to be

 underhand

Apparently, mum was furious

by the email I’d sent

She was absolutely livid

by its “condescending content”

I sat there in disbelief

 so very confused

(Aren’t head teachers meant

 to stand up for you?)

I mean you had read the mail

Why couldn’t you see

 That condescending was the last thing

I had intended to be?

Suddenly you change gears

Now it’s my teaching style

(I’m watching quietly

as my sins slowly stockpile)

My teaching style apparently

Is more openly ‘free’

(Something you initially

Gushed you loved about me)

“The previous teacher

was more rigid and firm”

(So that’s why this autistic child

 is struggling to learn?)

I do all that is required

on her learning support plan

My class has been well-behaved

From the moment I began…

I have been observed numerous times

 only positive feedback

So why is my teaching style

Now suddenly under attack?

You yourself commented

on how you preferred my ‘free style’

How happy the kids were

 So why is it now on trial?

I can’t teach as a carbon copy

of somebody else

All I can do

is teach as myself

Or is it simply

that you needed to find an excuse

To not buy out my contract

 (I felt utterly confused)

Realization

This wasn’t a warning

This wasn’t a mere chat

My contract had been terminated

And that was the end of that

 I honestly didn’t know

What was going on

 I’ve been in such a good space

I’ve been so emotionally strong

 I have been nothing but proud

that I’ve been authentic and true

that I’ve stated my case

when I have needed to

One thing I can say

with an absolute clear heart

 is that I strive my best to work

with parents

right from the start

And then in a moment of

Crystal

Clear

Clarity

A quiet inner voice said

“You are allowed to disagree”

You alone have the power

To decide who you are

To accept yourself unconditionally

(Even the parts that are marred)

It was a beautiful moment

of self-compassion and love

A wonderful flash

 of feeling enough

I am human

 I make mistakes

I sometimes take the wrong turn

I’m navigating through life

(I have so much to still learn)

While there were elements of truth spoken

that I could contain

(Things I’d do differently

If I had to do it again)

That definitely didn’t mean

 All these words directed at me

Summarised my existence

Of who I was meant to be

For a hypersensitive person

who’s lived with thin skin

When other’s words have had the power

To absorb and sink in

It felt incredible in that moment

to feel protected and love

With a part of me whispering

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