(Approximate reading time: 8 min)
Dam, this back-blogging is difficult;-)
I kind of see why people so often ‘sanitize’ their stories and leave out the yucky, dark parts of it, because when you are feeling happy and sunny…..
it’s sometimes the LAST thing you want to go back to.
At the moment, I feel a zillion times removed from 2021 Gayle.
Mmmmmm….it’s a conundrum!!!
So, I think I am going to have to do a little bit of hybrid blogging…a little bit from then, and a little bit from now to try and even it out a bit. 🙂
*****
Last year, in December I went home for Christmas and I spent numerous hours lying on the couch with my brother’s dog Biscuit!
(Seriously, LIKE HOURS!!)
When I returned back to London I just missed him so much it was ridiculous. I felt frustrated and irritated because the building that I live in doesn’t allow pets so I am unable to get a dog of my own.
Yes, that’s easily remedied…. I could always move, but I am very fortunate at the moment to be staying in a beautiful central London apartment, with estate-like gardens
(which I adore) at an insanely low rent.
I would be crazy to move!
(Sigh!)
What’s a girl to do?
Mmm…well,
She decides to become a dog walker🙂
The perks:
- Connect back into the world a little
- Make a little extra cash on the weekends!
- Get a teeny bit of exercise
- Get lots of doggy love!
It sounded like a good plan. 😉
What I certainly did not plan for was that I would be inundated with job offers!
(If only my online dating profiles had been this popular!)
In the last three months, I have done 8 house/dog sitting jobs, which have been amazing, and I haven’t had to step into a school once!
Granted I’m a not making nearly as much as I could if I was teaching full time …but these days the most important thing for me is my health and happiness.
(Over the month of August, I was away for the whole month and rented my room out on Airbnb which has also helped a lot.;-)
There is something about having a pet that just helps ground and connects you more to yourself and others.
Lets face it, London can be pretty dreary at times,
but hell when you have a pet (especially a cute one!)
….people smile at you…..
…people talk to you!
…..it’s like all of a sudden YOU ARE visible!
I even find myself smiling randomly at people who have pets now,
even when I DON’T have a dog with me.
It’s kinda like being part of this whole secret pet-loving club that I NEVER even knew existed!!
(For 47 years I was oblivious I tell you!!!)
It is funny – years ago I remember watching ‘Monster-in- Law’ and ‘ In her shoes’ where both the protagonists were dog walkers. Part of me thought how super cool would that be!!
(They just look so carefree and happy!!!)
Neurotic Angel,
(always the voice of reason)
brought me back down to earth and reminded me not to be ridiculous!
“No one could possibly make a real living doing that!
It’s a ROM -COM Gayle!!!”
So I filed it away as utter nonsense and as something that could only possibly work in the movies.
And yet all of a sudden here I am…
kinda making it work ( a little bit;-).
I have worked out that starting from this month on, if I do 8 days of supply work and fill the rest with dog sitting then I might just be able to turn this into a new vocation.
Random Info:
A couple of weeks ago I met a uuuhhhum….’Certified dog walker!‘ (Not just a normal pleb one, a CERTIFIED ONE!! as she very clearly pointed out to me;-) who was walking 4 dogs!
….she charges £25 for each dog!
That’s £100 for an 1.5 hours of work!
(Opposed to £145 per day as a supply teacher for 7 hours work)
Who knew it would be possible to earn more money walking dogs than teaching children?
(My poor parents could have saved a shit load on university fees!!)
Anyway, I sincerely doubt I’m going to go down that CERTIFIED route….
That sounds like waaaaaay too much exercise for me!
(Two walks a day with ONE dog is plenty for me)
Truth be told I’m pretty fucking lazy!
Unlike our Romocom Protagonists, my favourite part of pet sitting is the ‘sitting’ part
– Sitting on the couch for hours with a dog curled up next me,
Is there anything better?
Oooooh except for maybe falling asleep on the couch with a dog curled on top of me!!!
Aaah yes this is life! 🙂
I have found my true calling.
- Doing as little as possible
- Getting lots of doggy love
- Having all the time in the world to work on my blog!
Although these days, incidentally, it doesn’t really feel like a blog anymore.
It’s kinda like my very own online scrapbook that I get to sit and play and be creative with.
Seriously I spend waaaaaay too many hours colouring in little butterflies, finding gifs and pictures and random shit that really and truly isn’t necessary….except….
Oh my God, it’s so much FUN!!!!
A couple of years ago I read a book by Geoff Goins called ‘The art of work’. It’s a short little book about following your passions and finding your true calling.
In it, he talks about how we need to start by going over our life and finding those times when we were really happy, those moments in our life that gave us the most joy. How it is so often those random things that we did in our childhood that can actually lead us to connecting to our passions later on in life. As a child I adored my dogs, I loved drawing and writing letters to my friends.
But not just ordinary letters mind you.
There were carefully designed intricate works of ART!!!! 🙂
Covered with rainbows, butterflies and a shit loads of hearts!!!
Mmmm…does that sound familiar????
And If I do say so myself….it feels pretty dam good!!!
What can I say about this poem…..except
being disconnected from yourself is very painful…
Written 12 February 2021
The Flipsides of the Coin
Rage and grief are two courses that flow.
Overwhelming emotion,
unable to let go.
My body feels numb, my chest feels tight.
I cried so much I couldn’t sleep last night.
So tired of helpful critics. “Oh, just be strong”.
It compounds the shame that there is something wrong.
I lash out in anger, sometimes bitter spite.
Like a wild animal released I just want to fight.
But for all the anger and all of the rage,
there is so much more hidden, if you just turn the page.
My desire for genuine connection is strong.
To feel part of a family and like I belong.
The authenticity and freedom to be the real me.
We don’t have to have the same opinions (or always agree.)
Just allow me the privilege to acknowledge my hurt.
To own my own feelings and not have them subvert.
Please love me in all my anger and pain
and in all honesty, I promise I’ll try do the same.
Credits
Lake house Image by Frank Winkler from Pixabay